Hi Pozziepinoy,
I haven't got tested for any. I am afraid and I'm positive that I don't have it as I know for sure that I used condom since the first time I had sex when I was 18.
I've only had 2 bfs and more than 5 or less than 10 foreigners that I slept with. The last one was the one that is alarming. When we had sex, before the penetration, he was really having that loads of pre cum, he was uncut and when he was about to have orgasm, it looks like it didn't squirt at all that it was too small in terms of the fluid he released. After then, just this January, I feel like my anus got itchy, and as I examined it myself, I discovered some smegma, like the one that you see in uncut penis during young years. I got cuts in my anus as well before we had sex, I was not able to examine his penis if it was clean or not on that foreskinned part. But I know for sure that he had no warts, or discoloration or skin thing in his body.
I don't know where to go, who to consult, I'm really not ready of having HIV test, what should I do. I'm 21,
xxx
CONTRIBUTOR'S RESPONSE
Hi xxx,
Thank you for your email. I can understand the fears some, even many people have, regarding the HIV test. Some are afraid that it will be "bad news" and that they will test HIV+ and that they will be judged for being HIV+. The fact is, you may not be HIV+. Never the less, the fear that others will know, or assume, that someone is in an a socially stigmatized high risk group if they test positive, is possibly the major reason that people choose not to get tested. However, the reality is that choosing not to have an HIV test changes nothing for the better. Not knowing your HIV status will just exacerbate the stress that you are obviously feeling. More importantly, knowing your HIV status allows you to properly protect yourself and any future sexual partners. Being unaware or an HIV infection increases the possibility of it being unknowingly spread by way of unsafe sexual practices or needle sharing etc. Also, early diagnosis allows for the possibility of early medical intervention. The sooner a HIV+ person can begin treatment or prophylaxis for any opportunistic infections or the HIV itself, the healthier the body's immune system remains.
With regard to the sexual practices you have outlined, while you are to be congratulated for always using a condom I am not sure that you have been using them correctly. If the condom was in place during the whole episode of anal sex, and you were using a water or silicon based lubricant, then you were adhering to safer sex practices. However, if you practiced withdrawal, that is, he with drew before he came and then put the condom on and re-entered, then this is an unsafe sexual practice. If a petroleum based lubricant is used, this is also unsafe as it can cause the condom to break. The cuts you have mentioned on your anus increase the risk of the transmission of HIV, and other STIs. The unusual discharge you're referred to is of concern. These sorts of symptoms can possibly indicate the presence of STIs. They need to be checked out by a qualified Medical Doctor . As far as the visual examination of a sexual partner for other STIs, it helps but it is far from fool proof. Many STIs don't exhibit any visual signs yet the person can still remain infectious. HIV almost always only begins to manifest itself visually when the person is suffering full blown AIDS so a visual examination usually tells you nothing about a persons HIV status. If you had oral sex and you have no sores or cuts and abrasions in your mouth, then the risk of HIV transmission is theoretically possible but very slight. However, many other STIs can be transmitted via this route. The presence of sores, cuts or abrasions in your mouth increases the risk of transmission of all STIs. Your comparatively small number of sexual partners is irrelevant. It is the safety of your sexual practices that is.
I realize this is difficult but, the reality is, you need to get tested for the presence of HIV and other STIs as soon as possible.
I hope you have found this answer helpful.
Get tested, stay healthy and, if you're on ARV, stay compliant with your ARV regimen.
Malcolm Brown
"WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.
NO PLHIV is alone with his or her struggle with HIV!"
-Pozziepinoy-
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Hi Pozziepinoy,