Hi! Good day! I've read a lot of your blog posts and they are great especially to those who are newly diagnosed and to those who don't know what to do. I read also some of the PLHIV stories in your blog and i realized that i think its about time to share mine. Some may have the same experience as mine but i think everyone is unique so here it goes.
BACKGROUND
I came from a family who is medically inclined. one of my parents is a doctor and i have a sibling who is a RN. I am also a RN. i got tested for HIV last 2010. At that time i wasn't surprised because i was really promiscuous during high school and college. when the result turned out positive, i just smiled and rationalized that not all HIV+ will lead to AIDS. I convinced myself that there are a lot of people out there who are positive for several years and they are still alive. At first I didn't take it as a burden because few minutes after i got the result in the rapid test i immediately told my BF at that time and he was there to stay with me (lucky me). When i got the confirmatory test and the diagnosis i was pretty much relax. My CD4 at that time was 370+ so i opted out for treatment since i read all about the side effects of these medications.
A SAD STORY
My dilemma started when i broke up with my BF. I started thinking, "should i tell my next partner about my status?". they have the right to know but i have also the right for my privacy. i just told myself that as long as I do it safely then i dont think i still need to tell my future partner. last december 2010 i met this guy and he's a doctor. I immediately fell for him. he was like my bestfriend, my partner. at the back of my mind my conscience was telling me to disclose it to him, since he's a doctor he would understand and accept. so to make it short, i told him about it. then everything changed. he shut me out, he never texted me and never wanted to talk to me. that was the first time i felt that this thing i have is a big burden. i cant imagine going through the same process over and over again. I was planning at that time to proceed to medicine but after what he did i just decided not to. it opened my eyes that maybe i should really take this condition seriously but then again i did not. 2010 was my saddest christmas ever.
GETTING SICK
After college i decided to work as a call center agent and this was the time that my immune system started to show some signs. i got shingles and a cough that wouldn't go away. I think one of the reasons why my immune system collapsed was due to my vices. i cant stand a week without drinking. i need the feel of euphoria. the cough just took the life out of me. i felt like i was dying. i went to a pulmo but he coudnt find anything wrong with my lungs. it took me 3 months to recover from my cough. good thing everything was negative.
TURNING POINT
after all those hard times i decided to quit my call center job because i realized that its one factor that contributes to my health. From there i decided to go back to my original plan. going to med school. but there was some hesitation, so many thing were in my mind. if ill go to med school would i be able to finish it? would i be alive by then? my parents would just spend so much money for me but i wont be able to use it if ever something bad happens like ill get an OI. by the way my family doesn't know about my condition so going back, but as convinced my self to pursue on what i want. it doesnt mean am PLHIV, i cant be a good doctor.
Here I am a Medical Student and trying to live. the down side of being medically incline is i became hypochondriac. Every time i study something related to HIV i cant help but think. would i get this? would i get that? but then again i need to stay strong and firm.
TREATMENT
Last January 2013 i decided to go on treatment already because my cd4 was very low already, it was around 97 i think. My doctor told me that im pretty much healthy. she told me that cd4 isnt exactly the basis of someone's immune system, and i would have to agree with her. cd4 may gradually change anytime of the day but of course my numbers were not good, anyways ill end my story here hope i was able to give my story. hehe
-thechaseguy
"WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.
NO PLHIV is alone with his or her struggle with HIV!"
-Pozziepinoy-
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