Living with HIV in the Philippines: When to Tell a Potential Partner?

hi sir pozzie i have one question.. its bothering me for quite some time now.. i hope you can give me some advice regarding when to disclose to your potential partner your hiv status.. we've been dating for more than a month now and i don't know how to drop the hiv news to him..

thanks a lot and God bless sir..

XXX

POZZIEPINOY’S RESPONSE

Hi XXX.

Thank you for your email. Thank you for reading the blog.

It is imperative that you tell your potential partner about your HIV status before you guys make a commitment. He has the right to know and honesty is very important in a relationship. However, there are things to consider:

1. Your level of self acceptance of your status. The more that you accept your HIV status, the easier it would be to tell your potential partner about it. It is a key rule here. Self first, then others. Confidence in yourself is the most important factor in this situation. If you are confident in yourself, then you won't be scared to tell anything about yourself, even your HIV status.

2. How deep do you think your relationship will go? Although there is no concrete answer to this as a relationship is a never ending process of evaluations, adjustments of commitment, still trust is a key element in this process. If you think you are willing to commit with this person, he or she should be able to trust you with anything. This means, opening the pandoras box and telling him or her about your status at the most opportune time. Though you don't know the result of this, either positive or negative, at the very least, you have given him the right to choose between you as a person or the disease living in you.

3. When do you have to tell it? The earlier the better before you get in the situation that you get hurt bad because of rejection, because you have really fallen deep in love with the person.

Now, how do you go about it? Plan and execute. Don't think anymore as thinking may delay everything and cloud the path that you need to take. Just tell him directly and if he doesn't accept you, though its painful, then it is time to let go. But if he accepts you and loves you more, then you guys are meant to have each other.

If you need to talk more, please do call our Hotline Numbers below:

0919-642-9286

0977-131-2046

0906-389-2402

0917-899-0473

0927-823-0300

0917-932-3122

0916-216-2066

If you want to join a private HIV support group in Facebook, please add me, Pozzie Pinoy and request to be added in the group. We have a lot of PLHIV, counselors, HIV doctors, advocates and supporters who you can talk to.

I hope I was able to answer your concerns. Feel free to email me again if you have other questions.

Stay healthy,

Pozziepinoy

"We act FAST when we CARE"

-Pozziepinoy-

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