Thursday, December 20, 2012

Email 166: Worried About My Brother

Pozziepinoy,

Hi! I am just concerned with my brother's health. He's 20 y/o and I recently confirmed that he's gay. He has been having sexual contact with his boyfriend who is a call center agent, maybe since they started they relationship. And upon talking to our common friend, she confirmed to me that my brother has been like this since I left about 2 years ago. 

Boyfriends come and go and, of course, sexual contact as well. They are not even using condom or what. And she even told me that my brother goes to this website to meet and flirt with gay people as well. My brother even ask the people he meets online to go to our house and do their thing there. He's been having flu-like episodes, skin rashes, a mass on his calf and knee (like lymph nodes). He's not losing weight but his body looks more tired. He also has kidney stones that recurred just recently last December 1st only. 

I don't have the exact information because I chose not to talk to my brother and confirm everything because it feels awkward plus we are not that open especially him and he is not really open when it comes to his sexuality. Yet he confirmed that he stopped dating other people when i got back since April. But the thing is, he might carry the infection. 

I am aware what needs to be done like the ELISA Test and Western Blot Test as confirmation. Yet I am not sure where to bring him in Manila for HIV testing. Are hospitals in the province offer same testing as well like XXX or is it just limited here in Manila? Because we are from the province. However my brother is studying in XXX and I am working here. 

Thank you.
XXX

POZZIEPINOY’S RESPONSE


Hi XXX.

Thank you for your email.

 I understand that you so concerned with your brother. I understand about the dilemma of seeing your brother getting sickly. But I can't judge your brother, with his previous relationships or what he may have done in the past because of his sexuality, as you have never have confronted him yet, and the information that you have gathered did not directly come from him.

 I know you love your brother or else you won't email me about your fears. However, it is best to talk to him about it. He needs to understand where your fears are coming from and he needs to understand that no matter what, you will be there for him. It is only by talking that you can convince him to have the courage to take the HIV test. It is only by showing how much you care for him that he will start to be responsible for himself.

 With regards to the HIV Test, you can do it in any of the HIV Testing sites that I listed in the tab in the uppermost part of my blog. However, there are instances wherein the test was done in the province and there was a waiting period of 2 weeks to a month for the  confirmatory (Western Blot Test) as the blood sample will be sent either to Manila to be retested again or in another testing site.

 Since your brother is in Manila, maybe you can convince him to go to RITM Satellite Clinic in Malate to get tested. They do 2 tests there and the result comes in just 2 hours. No more of weeks of waiting period. You can come with him and you too can be tested, not because you have been exposed to the virus, but so as he will be relaxed in taking it. The place is discreet, and the staff are professional, non-judgmental and very accommodating. When you go there, just look for Lean or Phil and tell them that Pozziepinoy referred you. They will definitely assist you and your brother there.

I really wish that you can convince your brother to get tested. Talk to him and tell him what is bothering you. Show him that you love him, no matter what his sexuality is and no matter what his health status is.

You can coordinate with me if you need assistance. I already put my number in my "Contact Me" tab.

I hope I was able to answer your concerns. Feel free to email me again if you have other questions.


Stay healthy,
Pozziepinoy






"WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.
NO PLHIV is alone with his or her struggle with HIV!"

-Pozziepinoy-


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