Hi Pozzie,
I Just want to share my HIV experience.
I met my partner through online site in May 2011. Something happened during our first meet up, pero syempre that time may condom. After a week may nangyari uli saamin, that time without condom.
For one year na naging kami naging okay naman ang relationship namin, no big issue. He stayed in north and I live in south, about 4 hours travel time. Every week kami nagkikita, pumupunta ako ng north at minsan sya naman ang pumupunta sa south, walang weekend na hindi kami nagkita, except nung Christmas which I believe we have to celebrate it with our families.
On the second year na namin, he decided to stay with me in the south, kumuha kami ng small apartment at agad naman syang nakahanap ng work, during that time may mga bagay syang nabangit sakin about his past. May incident na he was raped, sometime in January 2011 daw, 5 months after naging kami. He immediately took HIV test and ang result is negative. Yung nga lang di sya nakapagpa test uli after 3 months. During our second year, may mga naeexperience syang changes sa katawan nya, like frequent coughing, body pain and fatigue. Sabi nya baka positive daw sya at gusto nya mag pa test uli. During that time akala ko nahawa na ako sa kanya. Kasi may mga na experience din ako changes sa katawan ko.
July 2013 nagkasakit ang partner ko, ang pagkakaintindi ko parang mild pneumonia. Pero still binaliwala namin yun. Inisip lang namin na normal lang naman magkasakit. Until November of 2013, hindi na nawala yung ubo nya, at namaga na din lmpnodes niya.
December 2013 he decided to take HIV test sa isang clinic. It was POSITIVE. Biglang gumuho mga pangarap niya. Ako, di ko alam ang gagawin, pero hindi ako natatakot na maging positive din. For 2 years na nagsama kami, lagi ako nagbabasa ng mga articles about HIV at dito sa blog mo, so somewhat Im knowledgeable enough to handle in maging positive ako. Masasabi kong READY ako.
December nagpunta kami sa RITM Malate Clinic to have his test redone parang makakuha na din agad ng confirmatory result at ako naman para makapagpatest. Nakita ko pa nga dun yung classmate ko nung elementary which turnout sya na din naghandle ng result namin. After 2 hrs, the result came. NEGATIVE ako, ang partner ko CONFIRMED POSITIVE.
Yung una ko naramdaman, umiyak ako at nalungkot, ang usapan namin kasi ng partner ko, sabay namin lalabanan kung ano man yung test na ibinigay samin ni God. Kakayanin namin yun ng sabay. naka ready kami na sabay mag pa check up, sabay uminom ng gamot. Pero negative ako. Hindi namin alam kung paano ihahandle na ako ay negative at sya naman ay positive. That day, ako yung iyak ng iyak.
The next day, nagpunta kami ng RITM Alabang for his CD4 test. 864 ang CD4 count nya. Somewhat na relief kami. Negative din sya sa mga other test. Currently he is only experiencing some skin problems which is manageable naman. Ako naman, nagaantay ng 3 months para makapagpa test uli. But whatever will be the result, Im OKAY.
Madami ako nerealize with this experience. First, hindi kelangan na pareho kami positive. Sabi ko sa kanya, mas okay siguro ito para mas maalagaan kita. Paano kung dumating ang point na pareho tayo may sakit, sino magaalaga saatin. Second, kung may laman yung utak mo about something, wala ka dapat ikatakot. Nagbabasa ako at nagtatanong kung may mga bagay akong gusto malaman. Salamat Pozzie sa website mo. Third, mas naging okay ang relationship namin, mas naiintindihan ko sya ngayon, mas hindi kami nagaaway. Feeling ko, may baby akong inaalagaan, dapat safe sya sa lahat ng bagay, dapat tama ang kinakain nya, dapat di sya napapagod. Last, this whole experience is a test from GOD. Hindi naman nya ito ibibigay saamin kung di namin kaya. Alam namin na ibibigay ni GOD kung ano ang pinaka mabuti saamin, dahil alam namin na mahal nya KAMI.
We are still living with a normal and a happy life. And we know we will still live long because we are POSITIVE person.
Thank you.
"WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.
NO PLHIV is alone with his or her struggle with HIV!"
-Pozziepinoy-
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